The Color of Water by James McBrideJames McBride's memoir, The Color of Water, demonstrates a man's search for identity and a sense of self. man who comes from his multiracial family. Her white mother, Ruth's abusive childhood as a Jew, led her to seek acceptance in the African-American community, where she created a large family from the two men she marries. James defines his identity through the truth of his mother's pain and exceptionality, through the family she creates and the life she leaves behind. As a boy, James questions his unique family and color through his confusion over issues of race. Later in his life, as a teenager, his racial perplexity leads James to hide from his emotions, relying only on the anger he felt against the world. It is only when James discovers his mother's past that he begins to understand the complexity of himself and form his own identity. As James matures, the racial issues in his life have become too obvious to ignore. Her multiracial family provides no clear explanations of prejudice and racism, and when "[James] asked [Ruth] if she was white, she would say, 'No. I'm light-skinned,' and change the subject." Ruth avoiding addressing racial issues causes confusion among the brothers, which "perplexed [James] to the point of bursting. [He] put the question to [his] older brothers... 'Are we black or white? ' One day [he] asked [his] brother David. “I'm black,” David said, “but you could be a nigger.” James's family, made up of a rainbow of colors, perplexes James's racial ideals , causing questions and insecurities within himself, pointing out that "being the token Negro was something I was never quite comfortable with..." When James begins his search for identity, he is stopped by the fact that his mother avoided race... middle of paper... the boy who looked in the mirror felt that it was no longer there." By discovering Ruth's previous life, James was able to understand his own singularity, therefore creating the identity that she tried to achieve with her life. Ruth has led a life split in two. Her subsequent life consists of the large family she creates with the two men she marries and her embarrassment in living between two racial cultures a secret from her children. , because she didn't want to revisit her past by explaining away her previous years. Once he discovered Ruth's previous life, James could define his identity through the truth of Ruth's pain, through the relationships she left behind, and then through the truth. experiences that James lived within the family she created. As a son, James could not truly understand himself until he discovered the truth about half of his mother's life, thus completing the blueprint of his own identity..